Let’s take a few moments to talk about wedding guest requests.
We’re not sure when asking for a song on an RSVP started but we’re confident we know why.
Before we begin we should make clear we LOVE requests from clients.
In 2023 Hampshire Event DJs received 9694 requests in advance of 367 parties.
They provide us with a unique insight into the tastes of our clients and their guests and allow us to keep on top of trends.
Whilst we don’t have a crystal ball to predict which songs will fill the floor at your party, we have a lot of experience of which songs will compliment your tastes and get guests on their feet.
When Did Wedding Guest Requests Become A “Thing”
Most people do not throw big parties as often as they attend other peoples.
We regularly hear feedback from perspective clients about other events they attended:
“Nobody danced“
“The DJ played rubbish music“
“The DJ didn’t play any of the requests we provided in advance“
If you’ve been to one of those parties and don’t want an empty floor at yours, asking attendees for suggestions is a sensible place to start.
It’s logical to assume if you play the songs people like they will dance.
An obvious conclusion but not always correct.
You’ve asked 80-100 people their opinions on something very subjective and personal to them.
In reality there will be some who enjoy the task but many feel daunted or under pressure to pick something good.
There will also be mischievous types suggesting songs which are completely inappropriate, just to see if the DJ plays it.
This is a great reason why you should never just cut and paste guest requests into a list for the DJ without filtering them first.
How To Get The Music You Want
Many couples decide not to risk a DJ and book a band instead.
Bands provide a repertoire of songs you can pick from which gives you control of the music.
One of the downsides of booking a band can be the cost.
Here’s a word of caution when choosing a band.
Some agencies will have acts with floating line-ups.
They assemble the band depending on the musicians available at the time.
We know of one instance where a band arrived with a different lead singer to the one the couple expected.
“Transport issues” is another excuse we’ve heard given when a London based agency couldn’t provide a band because they couldn’t find enough musicians.
Our advice is to always look for a band who have a reputation to protect, preferably run by one of the musicians.
We can recommend many local acts who are at the top of their game and our team are always happy to work with bands to deliver a great night for the client.
Why Wedding Guest Requests Are Important
We’ve talked before about how people have emotional connections to music.
Many of these are formed between your mid-teens and late 20s.
In music psychology its called a “nostalgia bounce”.
Hearing a familiar song will release Dopamine in your brain which gives you a happy feeling.
It might be the bride and her friends created new connections to a song on the hen weekend.
We are always aware requested tracks we might not be familiar with are often on the request list for this reason.
How Many Requests Is Too Many?
It depends entirely on what you want the end result to be.
If you want the DJ to just play the songs you and your guests have requested then give your DJ a list of 100 songs.
This will be more than enough music to fill a 5 hour evening.
But what it won’t have are the right songs for the DJ to create smooth transitions between the genres and styles you have selected.
If your vision is a brilliant party your guests will talk about for days afterwards, allow your DJ some freedom to work around your tastes.
Why Some DJs Won’t Play Wedding Guest Requests
It should be quite simple shouldn’t it?
You’ve provided a list of songs you like in advance but on the night the DJ doesn’t play them.
Often it’s because the DJ is stuck in a comfort zone.
They’ve been playing the same songs in the same order for 2 decades but can’t understand why fewer people are dancing.
As DJs get older their clients become younger and the gap between them grows.
Their knowledge and familiarity with the songs being requested becomes weaker.
Part of the skill of being a DJ is knowing which songs will work around other tracks.
Faced with a list of unfamiliar music some DJs just don’t know how to play it and don’t take the time to prep in advance.
If they’ve had your list in advance there is no excuse for them not to have all the music with them.
Better Wedding Guest Requests
We would recommend when you send out RSVPs you chose your language carefully if soliciting for requests.
Instead of asking guests to “pick song for the DJ to play” instead ask them if they would like to “suggest a song the DJ might play“.
This way if they pick a song you don’t like it doesn’t have to be played.
Perhaps even better is to ask them to “pick a song which makes them feel good”
Even if it’s not suitable for the dance floor we could still play it at the beginning of the night and create a subconscious reaction.
Your Perfect Party Playlist
Our team use a lot of research to support our instincts when it comes to selecting great music at your party.
We look at current radio airplay, Shazam and Spotify to identify current trends.
Another tool collects airplay data from your favourite radio stations and shows us what the most familiar and popular songs are.
Our team also have access to something nobody else has.
Perfect Party Playlist helps couples select songs which will fill their dance floor.
One wedding co-ordinator described it as “Tinder for party music” and it has been very well received by our clients.
In 2023 It generated 9694 requests for 2072 songs from 367 different events.
We us all this data to influence the ratings of the songs within our platform so you can make informed choices of what you might like to hear.
Here’s what some of our recent clients have said:
“We liked using the online portal to select songs we definitely wanted to be played and those we didn’t and Charlie did a great job of creating seamless transitions between songs to keep people dancing.
The dance floor was never empty!”
Laura, Wickham Estate October 2023
“We loved that we could pick songs to play and not to play and that requests were actually played on the evening”
Nysa, Burley Manor October 2023
“We liked the platform offered to request specific songs for the playlist.
Based on our recommendations the DJ chose music which worked really well around the songs we’d requested, and my new wife & I wanted to keep dancing all night”
Chris, Clock Barn October 2023
“We loved having the option to choose exactly which songs we did and didn’t want played via the portal and appreciated how Charlie checked with us first when guests requested songs that weren’t on our list”
Catherine, Beaulieu Hotel October 2023
See what everyone is getting excited about for yourself.
Ask for an online consultation and we’ll show you our client portal plus examples of previous party playlists so you can get a feel for what we do (and most importantly don’t) play.
Click on the orange button below and we’ll show you how easy it is to make your wedding the best arty you’ve been to!
Pic Credits Tom Langford